Still running

So there's not much to report. Still training, still running, entering the taper week. I've had a couple of horrid runs and one great run. The great run coming after a couple days of solid rest and proper nutrition...what a surprise!

I'm noticing a stronger level of determination in my mind these days. I still haven't revealed my goal of the ultra to anyone I know...I just know I'll get a negative reaction. People don't seem to think I'm capable of very much. Katy Perry's "dark Horse" had become my new work out pump up song. I know that the lyrics indicate something else, but I really feel like no one's really understanding how hard I've worked this winter to get stronger, to get faster. They only see me being slow and soggy...because in all honesty I was. Everyone has bad runs. This small break in the weather with spring like conditions has been a real game changer. This weekend could go very well if the weather holds out.

Everyone keeps asking me what my target is...I know what my target is. 2:15. I know it means I have to bust ass, but if the footing is good why couldn't I? If nothing else I know that I can hit a 2:20 if I work hard. My fall back is to 2:3? and I know that I want to do at least a 2:40.  The problem is the weather. I'm first wave, 8 am and the footing could be shit, the weather could derail me, but I know that I'm going to do the very best that I can and I won't give up this year.

3 years I've run this beast and every year my time is around the 4 hour mark minus a few minutes. The reality of that though is that I've never really properly trained up for it...I've always chickened out when the weather got too bad and to be honest I'd always though I couldn't run distance on the treadmill. Now I know that's not right. I can do anything if I put my mind to it.

There's snow in the forecast...they keep changing when It'll hit and how much of it...that could be the only real downfall. Please oh please let the sidewalks be clear. Please oh please let the footing be amazing. Please oh please let me not give up.

When that first bit of doubt creeps in, please oh please let me remember every slight, every knock. Remember being told I couldn't keep up with the 2:15 group. Please oh please let me smash my PB. Please oh please let me do what I know I'm capable. Remember the lack of belief, remember what was snickered and said...and then remember that if I do this, its like proving them all totally WRONG. It'll be like me rubbing their noses in a giant pile of virtual dog doody. Petty? Maybe. All i know is that if it makes me stronger, gives me what I need, than I will CRUSH this race on Sunday.